My Weight Loss Tracker


28 May 2009

May 2009...

Ok - so I haven't blogged here in a while - just had TONS of things going on. I AM however still going VERY strong low-carb wise. I have weighed in now for 5 weeks straight at 175. Don't get me wrong, that's AWESOME - but also a little frustrating....of course, though - I also have NOT been exercising at all. Seriously just been VERY busy.

This morning, however, the scale dropped to 173!!!!! I can't believe it! I am ONLY 4 pounds away from 169!!!!! My clothes are starting to be soooo loose that I'm going to seriously need to start some shopping soon. I have my "skinny" pair of jeans that fit - but all my other jeans, I HAVE to wear with a belt. I'm down to about a size 12 right now (13 in juniors) and my 17's in juniors - I absolutely can't wear unless I have a belt on - and I'm ONLY wearing them because I don't have the money to go buy new jeans... :P

I can not express enough - though - how much low carb has saved my life. seriously. It's funny because a year ago if you'd have told me to go on atkins I'd have laughed at you...and in fact I DID laugh at the thought because my doctor is the one who TOLD me to do atkins. I didn't believe her - I mean after all - YEARS of low-fat dieting is what had been screamed into my brain and it's what EVERYONE out "there" says to do - that low-fat is the "only" way to go and that low carb is "bad" for you...

I have finally gotten to the point, though, that it's like - well..."they" have always said, "eat less, move more" meaning eat low fat and exercise like crazy in order to lose weight. I did that and yes, it works, but it's NOT sustainable...and if you're NOT eating low-fat and exercising like crazy, your body just gains it right back.

So I've started to think - maybe "they" WERE wrong! What the mainstream has always boraged us with has NOT worked - and finally I did what "they" said was "bad" and yet it's WORKING!!!!!!

Seriously - WTF is up with that? "Maybe it's all been a big fat lie"...there's no MAYBE to that. It HAS been a big fat lie!

Granted, 5 weeks now I've been the same weight, but I've NOT been exercising like I used to - and I'm eating REAL FOOD with omg, dare I say it - FAT content like i've never eaten before...but I'm NOT eating bread, grains, sugar, etc...and ya know what? I've MAINTAINED that weight! It hasn't flucutated at all! Until this morning when it went DOWN!

Now - do I miss sugar? Abso-freakin-lutely I do! I'm human...for the first 29 years of my life I LOVED sugary foods. Dan went to go get me dinner last night and he stopped off at dairy queen for himself...I had litterally ONE taste of his ice cream and yes, part of me wanted to eat his entire was like heaven in my mouth. But I said NO. I would NOT do it because it's not that that's a "bad" food...but it's because now I know WHY I can't have ice cream. Instead of just saying, "nope - can't have ice cream, it's 'bad'" I know that if I eat sugar it raises my insulin which in turn keeps me fat. And I've OBSESSED over my weight long enough to finally realize that THAT'S the key.

Plus, I'm NOT obsessing over losing weight like I used to. I think - in all honesty - THIS is what I'm talking about when I say that "low carb has saved my life". Mentally it's just AWESOME that I don't obsess over dieting like I used to. It honestly feels AMAZING to focus my energy on other things.

AND - the absolute best thing? I KNOW that by June of next year - my wedding - I WILL WEIGH 160 POUNDS OR LESS!!!!!!!!!!!

That just almost seems foreign to me since, well after the first time I got down to that weight on weight watchers - it just kept coming back no matter what I did. But the difference is now - I know WHY I need to do low-carb. I also know that I CAN "indulge" once in a blue moon - but that I CAN'T do it every day or even every week for that matter.


03 May 2009

Sunday 03/May/2009

Ok, so April I was VERY lazy...went to the gym a total of like 4 I'm really hoping that in May I get my butt in GEAR!

On June 20th, my mom is coming down here so that we can see WICKED!! Since that's at 8 o'clock that night, I made an appointment at David's Bridal earlier in the day so I can try on bridal dresses...I have been there once already to try some on - and that was back in October - and that was also 22 pounds ago...SO this is definitely a motivation for me to hit the gym this month. :D

At the beginning of April I weighed 180 lbs. Now at the beginning of May I weigh 175 pounds. 5 pounds this month!!! that' AWESOME!! :) especially for being lazy and not working out a lot!

So I'm hoping - work out at least twice a week, if not three times a week - and HOPEFULLY by June 20th I can be down to 165. god - even thinking about that number has seemed SO out of reach since I gained all my weight back - but now - it's like at the tip of my fingers!!!!

Right now I'm wearing a size 13 - down from a 17 - and all my 13's are a BIT loose...I actually wore one of my three pieces of clothing in my closet that I've REFUSED to throw away because "one day they'll fit again" was a nice black and blue skirt. It didn't fit exctly as I will admit it's a side zipper an I had to leave about a half inch of it unzipped (shhhh don't tell) but it looked FABULOUS with the shirt I was wearing - and the fact that I haven't even been able to get it over my hips for the longest time?!! yeah - it's awesome

SO - for June 20th I am SERIOUSLY hoping I can be down to a size 11 (in 'real world' sizes and that'll mean i'm about a 14 in wedding dresses...

when I tried them on back in October, I was in a size 20 wedding dress! :( 
so i HAVE to be in a 14.

Now - I really do NOT honestly think it'll happen - but omg - the wedding is a year away - if I could seriously be in a size 10 wedding dress??? (be a size 6 in real life) I think i'd seriously cry.

But I'd be SO happy if I could just get down to a 10/11 in the "real world" and a 14 in wedding - I'd stay at that forever. :)

I honestly can not tell you guys how happy I am to have found atkins - everything about it just makes sense.

AND i'm eating HEALTH foods - not junk food that i thought was healthy (100 calorie packs anyone? lol)

For example - this morning - I had:
2 tbsp flax seeds (1.5 g carbs, 2.5 g fiber)
1 egg white (.5 g carbs)
1/4 cup coconut milk (0 g carbs)

mix those first three ingredients in a bowl - microwave for 1 minute

take out and mix together more...add:
1 tbsp natural peanut butter (or almond butter, i've used both) (2 g carbs)
1 tbsp unsweetened organic shredded coconut (1 g carbs, 0.5 g fiber)
1/2 tbsp chia seeds (0 g carbs, 3 g fiber)
a few drops of stevia liquid sweetener (0 g carbs)

mix all that together in the bown and microwave for 30 minutes

take out and add:
1/4 cup coconut milk (0 g carbs)
1/2 cup berries - i used blackberries (6 g carbs, 3 g fiber)

TOTAL carbs: 11 grams carbs - 9 g fiber - 2 g net carbs

and it was FABULOUS!!!!!!! :P

see - atkins isn't all about meats, eggs and cheese. it's about learning what else is out there and how to treat your body right.

PLUS these new chia seeds I bought are freakin' CHOCK full of omegas! they're SO much healthier for you than flax (although flax is still good for you!) - but chia seeds are just CHOCK full of omegas.

one serving size is actually 1 full tablespoon but instead I only used 1/2 tbsp this morning because I plan on going to the gym later and trying 1/2 tbsp in my protein shake later. and at $16 for 30 tbsp...I want it to really last.

that's all - i think i'll post more this month - especially about exercising more.

01 May 2009

ATKINS - my "magic weight loss pill"

Ok - so the following was a thread i posted on the ADDB board about how much i LOVE LOVE LOVE atkins:

And thy name is ATKINS!!!!!

Seriously you This morning when I woke up I got on the scale (I check every other day or so...) and holy - I couldn't believe my eyes...175!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am 15 freakin' pounds away from my goal!!! NOT 36 like I was on January 1st!I have battled my weight for so long I've lost count of the amount of times I've lost weight only to gain it back.

But that's what low-fat DIETS do to ya...I have NEVER EVER found a way of eating that makes me HAPPY and I don't feel deprived on. So after I saw 175 on the scale - I got dressed and put on a skirt that I usually wear and it looked really I thought to myself "hmmm I wonder" I pulled out one of the 3 pieces of clothing I have had sitting in my closet for that time of "just in case it ever fits again"...I've got 1 pair of slacks (size 11 juniors yet to get into) and 2 skirts all of which I LOVE too much to throw out even though for the LONGEST time they've not fit because I kept gaining weight back. Well, I put on one of the skirts - and i'm here at work, typing this WEARING THAT SKIRT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can seriously TASTE the 160's!!!!! I WILL be 160 pounds (if not lower) for my wedding! I just honest to god can NOT believe that!!!! It still seriously blows my mind how EASY this way of life is - and it honest to god HAS become my "way of eating"...I don't even have to think about it. Do I want sugar? Yes - I fullheartedly admit that my brain still tells me, "ooooh that cake looks good. ooooh that cereal, poptarts, ice cream, starbucks frappuccino, etc...looks awesome!!!" yes - I absolutely still think about eating those things...however I've finally realized that I want to be healthy and thin so much more and I know that if I were to give in and eat those things #1 I'll get sick and #2 I'll gain weight plain and simple. If I really want to lose weight and feel good in my skin and my clothes, I HAVE to eat low-carb / low-sugar and continue following the rules of atkins. No ifs ands or butts.

And have I cheated in the 4 months that I've lost 21 pounds? Barely...admittedly I had some REAL ice cream at Kings Island last weekend - and I can't tell you how incredibly it tasted...BUT that was saturday night around 9 p.m. (and btw, I shared a SMALL bowl of it with Dan)...but sunday afternoon omg did I pay for it (and i'll leave it at that).But I LOVE LOVE LOVE this way of eating because I NEVER feel deprived! And when I do think about wanting something sugary - I always remember how literally sick it makes me because my body can NOT metabolize sugar. And when it does, I either get sick or gain weight.Since I lost a bulk amount of weight back in 2003/2004 (on weight watchers) I thought that THAT was the only way to lose weight (205 to 160)...but no matter HOW hard I tried I just couldn't get back into it because low-fat/high-carb (including candy/sugar) just always made me depressed and I'd always end up going back to eating junk...But the FAT and whole foods I eat - I don't WANT to eat junk food anymore (well, I want to but I know why NOT to) seriously blows my mind...and to think that in a few months I WILL be back down to 160 almost makes me want to cry because I was beginning to think it'd NEVER happen again. And not only have I finally found what to do to get skinny - I'm also HEALTHY. All my blood levels are NORMAL and I just feel incredible!

And, no I haven't lost NEARLY as fast as some people and some weeks I don't lose anything - but that's ok because I know that in continuing to eat this way I WILL GET TO MY GOAL and I don't even have to "try"...And the DIFFERENCE this time - how I KNOW I'm NOT going to gain this weight back that I've gotten rid of?...I don't feel guilty anymore. Food doesn't have that emotion over me that "oops - I screwed up - might as well completely ruin it". Not ONCE in the past 4 months have I felt like that - when that's how I've felt for sooooo long while on low-fat diets. Ok - off my soapbox now. To any newbies out there who are struggling because you just "CAN'T" give up your bread or sugary filled foods - just do it. all or nothing. THIS PLAN WORKS!

so yeah - I'm almost there and seriously I couldn't be happier!!! For YEARS after I lost my weight on weight watchers (and slowly but surely gained most of it back) - no matter HOW hard I tried and how long I counted points and did everything "perfect" - working out, eating right and GAINING weight...always trying to figure out what was going on - I finally HAVE figured out what was wrong with me. :(
It sucks that I am insulin resistant because - yes, I TOTALLY miss sugar - but now that I know that SUGAR is what makes me FAT (not actual fat!) - I've given it up and couldn't be happier!!!!!

I WILL weigh 160 lbs again! (if not less!!!!)

I'll also repost new pics once I can - now that i'm past 20!