SUGAR ADDICTION...and sleep

Ok, so I truly 100% believe that SUGAR is an addictive substance. It's a powdery white substance that goes into your body and once it is in your bloodstream, you just crave MORE AND MORE AND MORE. It's a vicious cycle - and what is so aweful is that - unlike illegal drugs, sugar is SO widely accepted - and not only "accepted" but even FORCED upon us sometimes WITHOUT our knowledge!!

Now - since changing my lifestyle and becoming low-carb, this year - I have to say there've been many times when I've been "strong" and said NO to sugar...
Valentine's day, for example - my fiance and I went out with his family to Bucca Di Beppo (yes, that was hard enough, being an italian/pasta place!) - and EVERYONE ordered the Red Velvet Cake at the end of the meal. I didn't touch it at all - even with everyone saying "oh, c'mon - just one bite!" nope - didn't do it!

Then there was the time when - at work - I was working on an incredibly difficult project and the project manager came to me with a "peace offering" due to how difficult the project was and so brought me cookies from the cafeteria...I thanked her and once she left, I gave them to my co-workers! :D

Now - admittedly - on the day of my 30th birthday party, I DID "endulge" (ok, yeah, I binged) on red velvet cake (did I mention this is my favorite? lol) and brownies and cookies, etc. etc.

After the party, though, I got RIGHT back on track and lost the weight I'd gained during that binge.

Thing is, though, what truly really SUCKS is that no matter HOW much you say NO and how hard you try - the ADDICTION will ALWAYS be there! Again, I've been SO good - but I'll admit one of my BIGGEST issues is that I like sandwiches. They're simple - fast and easy. So last week I had real bread probably at least once a day for about 4-5 days straight last week. Granted, it was only ONE TIME per day (not for all three meals, but only ONE) - however the problem is the carbs IN that bread just seemed to keep sparking something...

And everyone knows that halloween was this past weekend. I bought candy I thought I wouldn't mow down on...wellllll - yeah. We had some left over and so in the past few days I've had at least ten mini snickers bars! ACK!

I'm not perfect and I know that - but it pisses me off that it's SO incredibly easy to just fall back into the habit like that!

Today - I actually decided to REALLY start journaling. I'm not doing it on here and probably won't share - but I'm keeping an actual JOURNAL that will also keep track of how I sleep at night (this is the main reason) as lately I've really been trying to figure out how to get my insomnia under control.

Some nights I sleep GREAT while other nights are aweful.

Last night, for example - I took two 3mg pills of melatonin and I actually think I slept pretty well. I fell asleep around 11 last night and don't remember waking up til around 5! that's HUGE for me. but the funny thing is - I ate three snickers last night alone!

So I'm just really curious to really document and figure out my sleep patterns - what I ate the day before - as well as my mood patterns...another thing is while I have horrible sleep at night - there are some days when, while driving home from work - I SERIOUSLY feel like falling asleep at the wheel!

That has been going on for at LEAST 10 years!

I'm still trying to figure out if maybe I'm deficiant in an amino acid or not.

So we shall see.

I'm sure I'll blog about some of my findings. Later!